 The 14th Annual Hard Choice Awards
(for films reviewed in 2007)
It's that time of year when everyone with something to say puts it in a list. This is my list. No party, no fanfare, no shindig, no porn stars, no statuettes. No lifetime achievement awards, no drag queens, no envelopes, no acceptance speeches, no Ms. Congeniality. Just the year's best in all-male porn. Guaranteed to keep you hard. By Onan the Vulgarian
With Harley Shadow
In “Junkman’s Obbligato,” beat poet Lawrence Ferlinghetti wrote that he yearned to go to a place “where turtles win.” I like to think of 2007 as the year that turtles won. Not to disparage the hares of the industry, it was gratifying (and I hope readers agree, whether or not their names or their favorites are on this list) to see so much variety in 2007. “Little guys” produced some mighty big results, and “big guys” who never won before surged into greater prominence.
Chief among the latter was Raging Stallion Studios. In a time when pundits warn of the demise of DVDs, producer-director Chris Ward and co-director Ben Leon had the cojones to mastermind a 6-disc, 20-hour sexual marathon called Grunts, and to sell it for over $100. It simply blew everyone out of the water; not only was it good, it was very, very good — and it sold like hotcakes. Grunts is now the War and Peace (War and Piece?) of gayporn, and it’s the line drawn in the sand for those who say the DVD is dead.
 Kristen Bjorn is another perfect example of the turtle metaphor. To quote another poet, Gerard Manley Hopkins, “Sheer plod makes plow down sillion shine,” or slow and steady wins the race. This director has been turning out masterpiece upon masterpiece, for twenty years. Perhaps it’s because people are accustomed to expecting nothing less than brilliance that not a lot gets said when Bjorn delivers it. In 2007, he gave us left-right knockout punch with El Rancho and Rocks & Hard Places.
Other studios and other directors continue to produce high quality films that are both art and erotica — something that cannot be matched by scenes shot for websites. Lucas Kazan gives us lust and romance; Michael Lucas gives us complex characters, whether tragic or comic, for whom sex and life are inseparable. If I don’t name anyone else, it’s not because there are none to name, but because there’s no way to properly acknowledge the value of everyone’s contributions.
 Several performers galvanized attention in 2007, and deciding on a performer of the year really was a hard choice. Jesse Santana got the nod, not only because of the variety of his work for several studios and online producers, but for his sexual versatility, a couple of fine thespian turns and the reliability with which he gave one compelling performance after another.
Steve Cruz was an easier choice for newcomer. The perfect physical foil to Santana, Cruz is a guy who openly relishes anything sexual, and who’s giving back to the industry and to the community with his own safer sex website and educational outreach. Visit him at www.howiroll.info.
Studios outside of the USA made such an exceptional showing in 2007 that I decided to give separate awards to Film, Director and Actor for films shot on foreign turf.
This is the first time the Hard Choice Awards have recognized work initially produced for Internet consumption, but if you’ve paid attention to the stuff the Bryan Ockert is doing with Chaos Men, you know that not only has he created new niches in a genre where you’d figure there are none left, but he’s put sex between the ears again.
Last year, Titan Media founder Bruce Cam said farewell to the industry. This man is so formidable with a camera in his hand that anything in his viewfinder lays down at his feet and gives up its wonders. Cam has packed up his camera and director’s chair in favor of other pursuits, exiting grandly with Breakers, which will certainly factor into next year’s Hard Choice Awards. And Barcelona’s Private Man, which appears several times in the list below, decided to cease production of its gay film lines; that was disappointing.
Finally, a comment about the demise of the original X-Factor. After more than 18 years, the publisher decided to fold the publication, which I founded. It took a while to gather my bearings, but with the support and encouragement of an outstanding team of freelance writers (to whom I offer sincere thanks) and others, I decided to keep the publication alive. In the doing, I lost a print publication but I gained an “X” — to become XX-Factor. Without the space constraints of a print publication, for the first time I am able to list the runners-up, those films that made the “short list” of final contenders but did not win.
Thanks to everyone on this list for keeping us hard all year, and thanks to every reader. Please hold our feet to the fire and let us know how we’re doing.
Performer of the Year
Jesse Santana
Runners-up: Steve Cruz, Vinnie D’Angelo, Tory Mason, Lucio Maverick
Best Film — USA
Grunts, Raging Stallion Studios
Runners-up: Communion, Hot House Entertainment; Fear, Titan Media; The Intern and Gigolo, Lucas Entertainment
Best Film — Foreign
El Rancho, Kristen Bjorn Productions
Runners-up: The Crave, Tom Bradford Presents; Night Eyes, Bubble B Entertainment; Splash, Studio 2000; Summer Cruising, AYOR Studios
Best Director — USA
Chris Ward and Ben Leon, Grunts, Raging Stallion Studios
Runners-up: Tony Dimarco, The Intern and Gigolo, Lucas Entertainment; Brian Mills, Fear, Titan Media; Steven Scarborough, Communion and White Heat: Trunks 4, Hot House Video
Best Director — Foreign
Kristen Bjorn, El Rancho
Runners-up: Tom Bradford, Here Cums the Bridegroom, Private Man and The Crave, Tom Bradford Presents; Lucas Kazan, The Men I Wanted, Lucas Kazan Productions; Danny Ray, Hot Property, High Octane Productions
Best Director — Web
Bryan Ockert, www.ChaosMen.com
Best Screenplay
Tony Dimarco, The Intern and Gigolo, Lucas Entertainment
Runners-up: John Bruno, Line-Up, Mustang Studios; Marco Guerra, Punks, FPG Entertainment
 Best Actor — USA
Braxton Bond, Dare, Falcon Studios
Runners-up: Buck Angel, Buckback Mountain, Buck Angel Entertainment; Jake Deckard, Grunts, Raging Stallion Studios; Jason Ridge, My Virtual Jr. Daddy, Virtual Male; Ricky Sinz, Grunts, Raging Stallion Studios
Best Actor — Foreign
Flavio Valentino, Bodyguards, Olympus Studio
Runners-up: Drago Lembeck, One Track Mind, Private Man; Dean Monroe, Rich Kid, Private Man; Glen Santoro, Here Cums the Bridegroom, Private Man; Samuel Dolce, The Men I Wanted, Lucas Kazan Productions
Best Supporting Actor
Christian Cruz, The Intern, Lucas Entertainment
Runners-up: Jan Fischer, Brotherhood, Buckshot Productions; Jesse Santana, The Stone Age, EON Films; Chuck Scott, Depraved, Channel 1 Releasing; Ray Star, Gigolo, Lucas Entertainment;
Best Non-sexual Performance
Ryan Block, Hungry 4 Sex 2, Gino Pictures
Hon. Mention: Spencer Quest, Gigolo, Lucas Entertainment
Best Videography
Hunger, Black Scorpion Video
Runners-up: Communion, Hot House Video; El Rancho, Kristen Bjorn Productions; Gigolo, Lucas Entertainment; H2O, Titan Media
Best Film Editing
Edge Series #1, ChaosMen.com
Hon. Mention: Grunts, Raging Stallion Studios
Best Art Direction
H2O, Titan Media
Hon. Mention: The Crave, Tom Bradford Presents
Most Passionate Sex
Gage Weston and Mitch Branson, Hawai'i, COLT Studio
Hon. Mention: Buck Angel and Lobo, Buckback Mountain, Buck Angel Entertainment
The Year's Best Sex
- Carmello and Kidd, Steel Curtain, Pitbull Productions
- Adam Cooper and Race, A(dam) to Z(ack), ChaosMen.com
- Dean Monroe and Brian Bodine, Cock Shots, Studio 2000
- Jesse Santana and Tyler Saint, Fraternity Gangbang 2, Jet Set Men
- Kadu Meyer and Pedro Lamasta, Friends & Lovers, U.S. Male
- Eric Hung and Robert Van Damme, Hungry for Sex 2, Gino Pictures
- Ray Star and Todd Welch, Welcome to Paradise, Lucas Entertainment
- Remy Delaine and Roman Ragazzi, Tailpipes, Raging Stallion Studios
- Roman Ragazzi and Barrett Long, Playback, Raging Stallion Studios
- Sancho Sun and Richard West, Night Eyes, Bubble B Entertainment
Best Sex for 3 or More
- Mason Wyler, CJ Madison and Roman Ragazzi, Miami, Collin O'Neal's World of Men
- The fuck orgy in Mirage, Raging Stallion Studios
- Robert Van Damme, Josh Weston and Brad Rock, The Muscle Pit, Big Blue Productions
- Marc Williams, Zen and Rodney, Marc’s Hawaiian Dreams, BlackMen.Net
- Jake Dakota, Andrew Justice and Tyler Saint, Vanished, Mustang Studios
- Nick Piston, Jay Armstrong and Vinnie D’Angelo, Full Throttle, Hot House Video
- Arpad Miklos, Cole Ryder and Steve Cruz, When Bears Attack, Channel 1 Releasing
- Vinnie D’Angelo, Matt Cole and Steve Cruz, Communion, Hot House Video
- Dean Flynn, Francois Sagat, Brody Newport, Diesel Washington and C.J. Madison, Fear, Titan Media
- Flavio Valentino, Kane O’Farrell, Alfredo and Renato Belaggio, Bodyguards, Olympus Studio
Best Solo
Ricky Sinz, Grunts, Raging Stallion Studios
Runners-up: Tommy Blade, Forbidden Dreams, Raging Stallion Studios; Tom Chase, Minute Man 29: Built, COLT Studio; Drago Lembeck, One Track Mind, Private Man; Brad Star, Please Don’t Tell, HIS Video
Best Oral Sex
Shane Leblanc and Jeremy Hall, Vancouver Nights, Fierce Dog
Runners-up: Muzzafar and Jalal Aldin, Arabian Tales 2, Alexander Pictures; Jeremy Hall and Victor Banda, H2O, Titan Media; Roman Heart and Tony Martin, Ivy League, Falcon Studios; Joey Amis sucks everyone in sight, Mating Season, Bel Ami
(Corollary: Best Ball Sucking: Proven Straight, Jet Set Men)
 Best Rimming
Ray Star and Todd Welch, Auditions 18: Florida, Lucas Entertainment
Hon. Mention: Tory Mason, Jan Fischer and Emilio Sands, In His Dreams, Rascal Video
Best Daddy-Boy Sex
Arpad Miklos and Zack Randall, Gigolo, Lucas Entertainment
Hon. Mention: Roman Heart and Chase Hunter, Basic Plumbing 3, Falcon Studios
Best Butt Parade
Grunts, Raging Stallion Studios (furry)
Beach House Diaries, Men of Odyssey (smooth)
Most Fuckable Boy in the World
Kidd
Hon. Mention: Troy Allen
Best Music
Dardo, Hunger, Black Scorpion Video
Runners-up: Jer Ber Jones and Dudley Saunders, Buckback Mountain, Buck Angel Entertainment; JD Slater, Erotikus, Centurion Pictures XXX; Rock Hard, Hawai'i, COLT Studio
(Corollary: Best Sound Effects: The Crave, Tom Bradford Presents)
 Having a Blast! (cum shot)
The cast of Splash, Studio 2000
Hon. Mention: Mario McCabe, who climaxes every two minutes in Uncut Cock Pool Party, Lucas Entertainment
Best New Kids on the Block
Performer: Steve Cruz
Director: Jake Deckard
Studio: FPG Entertainment
Rub Me the Right Way
Kurt Koenig and Tom Engelhoff, "Not for Sale," Why the Wooden Indian Wouldn't, Athletic Model Guild
Best Mind Fuck
Tyler Cane and Kai Grant, Campus Pizza, Titan Media
Best Classic DVD
The Idol, Bijou Video
 Savage Humor Award
The “Michael Lucas found dead” publicity campaign for Gigolo
Cleverest Title
In Tents Orgasm, Euroboy XXX
 Onan's Pantheon of Michelangelo Bodies
Blu Kennedy, Alexy Tyler
Deepest Throat
Milan Gamiani
Best Buns
Carlos (aka Oleg Tarkowski, Karel Rok, Cole Powers, Karel Kohlicek)
Best Chest
Dean Flynn
 Hottest Man on the Planet
Roman Ragazzi
Chance Erotic Moment
Guy Parker's gymnastics fantasy, Bottom of the 9th: Little Big League III, All Worlds Video
Immor(t)al Dialog
Christian Cruz to Ben Andrews, who is about to get his first blow job: "Don't worry, I've done this before." The Intern, Lucas Entertainment
Best Credits
Ranger, Mustang Studios
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