Line-Up (MVP 087) a review by Onan the Vulgarian Best of Phoenix Alternative Video Reviewer

	Cast: Dak Ramsey, Alesandro, Alex Eden, Dean Campbell, Kristian Alvarez, Park Wiley, Tim Towers, Troy Brewer. Directed by John Bruno for Mustang Studios.
	Falcon Studios, P.O. Box 880906, San Francisco, CA 94188. Toll-free orders 800-227-3717 (in CA, 415-431-7722). Internet www.falconstudios.com.
	Click here to purchase.

Director John Bruno finds a way to merge his taste for crime with his taste for porn in Line-Up. The premise is so preposterous, you have to laugh — except for when you are panting from all the beefcake, blow jobs and boinking on your screen.
    Tim Towers plays a medium whose paranormal powers are sought by police departments all over the country. Tim's specialty is in catching sex offenders: when a guy's cock is in his mouth, he can see that man's entire sexual history. His nickname is "The Cock Clairvoyant."
    Miami police detective Kristian Alvarez thinks that Towers' powers are a crock of shit, but he's open to persuasion (or to perversion), so he invites him to come to a run-of-the-mill lineup. What we never learn is whether Alvarez knows who the perp is, and is just testing Towers, or whether it's Towers' job to discover the criminal.
    There are three suspects: Troy Brewer, Dak Ramsey (looking hot on the DVD cover) and Dean Campbell. It'd be interesting to know how they feel about the test about to be performed — especially as they don't get to cum. Is it exciting? Degrading? Unconstitutional? Do they want to come back for seconds?
    Brewer is first, and after a few subliminal black and white flashes of indistinct sexual activity, Tim sees a red flash and everything comes clearly into view. It doesn't look like Brewer's going to be the guilty one, because he's the one that gets coerced into giving Alex Eden a blow job in the back room of a bar. Eden seemed lost in Mustang's Afterhours, but he's fully in charge here, taking his pleasure from Brewer whether he's on the giving or receiving end of the sucking, rimming and fucking.
    By the way he rapidly moves his feet up and down when it's his turn, you figure Dak Ramsey is looking forward to this. When the haze clears, Tim sees a dungeon with Alesandro in a cylindrical cage and Dak sucking him. Alesandro doesn't remain caged for long. Like Eden, he's a big, beefy man, who is mostly a stranger to wax and razors. They suck and rim each other, with plenty of verbal coaching from Dak and moans from Alesandro, then they fuck each other in a sling and on top of another cage.
    The director tricks you at the end of the scene. Dak cums on his tummy while he's getting fucked and Alesandro feeds his cum to him. Then we see Dak on his feet, cumming in Alesandro's face. Two models, two cum shots; it wasn't until the next scene started that I realized Alesandro did not have an orgasm.
    Dean Campbell, the last man in the lineup, looks distinctly uncomfortable by now, and I half-expected, when Tim started to suck him, that we'd see flashes of pussy. But we don't. We see Park Wiley in a cheesy motel going to bed after calling the desk to request a wake-up call. During the night, Dean lets himself into Park's room with a credit card, strips, and begins masturbating over Park's body. Once his cock is hard, he jumps on Park, who is sleeping face-down on top of the sheets, and slams his pole into Park's crack.
    Once Park realizes what's happening, he really gets into it, especially the workover his ass gets from Dean's hands and mouth. But Dean does not like all the noise Park makes, and the more Park squeals and grunts, the more abusive Dean becomes. That just turns Park on all the more.
    Alvarez gets his man, but he wants more proof that Towers is not a fraud, so he ask Tim to suck him. We never learn anything about the detective's past, but his present is fully occupied with getting his rocks off. It's almost a shock to see Alvarez naked: he's waxed smooth as a baby, top to bottom and front to back. It's so incongruous, given that all the other models have plenty of body hair. Alvarez also does not reciprocate — Tim gets not so much as a peck on the cheek from him.
    Despite the weak conclusion, Line-Up is frivolous and furry fun, with a cleverly original premise and three strong scenes.
    The DVD has a Web link and previews.

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