Ripped N Ready a review by Onan the Vulgarian Best of Phoenix Alternative Video Reviewer

	Cast: Double R, Jason Tiya, Sylk, Kidd, Joshua, Haze, Titan, Loverboy. Directed by Double R.
	Pitbull Productions, 200 E. 116th St., #2N, New York, NY 10029. Toll-free orders 877-THUGPORN. Internet www.thugmart.com.

Ripped N Ready showcases the performer Double R (which means "roughest rider," as he tells Sylk just before he fucks him), who appears in three of the film's five scenes. The film's producers would also like you to know that Double R, who was a nominee for "Best Newcomer" in this year's GayVN awards, is 5-foot-10, weighs 183 pounds, has a 9-inch cock, can bench-press 405 pounds and was born on the cusp of Cancer and Leo.
    Double R wrangles Kidd in the first scene. Kidd knows cock: the grip, the spit, the suction, the tongue, the "pop" when he pulls his mouth away, the angle of the head and neck. Being a "dominant top" means that RR is absolved of the need to reciprocate (and as you'll see in the next scene, he's absolved of the need to wait for his partner to climax), so he enjoys Kidd's oral ablutions, then he fucks him so hard and fast, the slapping of their flesh together sounds like applause.
    Kidd's cum flies long, some of it going in his mouth. Double R likes that, so he has Kidd finish him off orally so that he can squirt deeply into Kidd's mouth. Kidd loves every minute of it.
    Handsome Sylk is in the wrong place at the wrong time. Double R has bought a computer from Sylk's roommate, but when he arrives to pick it up, the roommate is out and the only computer around is a disassembled old desktop model, not the laptop RR thinks he bought. Double R tells Sylk he has not intention of leaving empty-handed, so Sylk obligingly puts out.
    Sylk is dreamily handsome and Double R has such a good time, he says he's gonna buy a pair of roller skates so he can get there faster the next time, after the computer sale has been resolved. Meanwhile, Sylk is advised to tell his roommate, "his asshole is next." Then RR says, "I'm gonna leave you here to finish up your job" and he puts his clothes on and splits, leaving Sylk jerking off on the couch.
    Haze gets a surprise one morning when he looks out his window and sees a naked stranger, Jason Tiya, in his swimming pool. He leans out the window and asks, "what you doin' out there?" Tiya tells him to come find out, and what Haze finds out is that he wants this stranger for breakfast.
    Neighbors be damned, Haze sucks Jason there in the back yard, then they opt for the comfort a bed to fuck in. Haze shows Jason his oral skills then Jason grabs the lube, holding the bottle alongside his cock to show that his cock is bigger (it's not a small bottle). It takes a while for Jason to get his cock fully inside, but after that, they make the bed springs sing.
    Joshua calls the super of his apartment to complain about mold, and Double R comes to investigate. RR wants to talk about payment before talking about solutions, and off come his pants. Joshua chows down. After a while, Double R jumps to his feet, flexes is pecs and biceps, then launches his anal assault. Joshua appears not to like it, so RR face-fucks and teabags him for a spell, then goes back to fucking him.
    As he did with Sylk, RR leaves right after hihs orgasm. Joshua snarls that the only way to get a job done is to di ot yourself, as he uses his hand to finish himself.
    When Titan and Loverboy bicker over who gets to hold the remote control for the TV, they settle their differences by deciding to have sex instead. Loveboy spends a lot of time expertly hoovering Titan's cock, which is obviously the inspiration for his screen name, but Titan reciprocates only to extent of plugging Loverboy's ass, in numerous positions.
    Minuses: Occasional black and white footage is interspersed with the color, but only in two scenes, and not with any rhyme or reason. It's OK to have a top who does not reciprocate, but when that becomes the model for every scene in the film, and when there's no rimming by anyone, it becomes a little monotonous.
    Pluses: Although Kidd was my favorite, all the models who bottom in Ripped N Ready are champion cock suckers. Double R is an idiosyncratic performer with a great body and a laid-back attitude about being the object of men's desires. His verbal monologues are as funny as they are off-the-wall, as if getting his cock sucked sends him into flights of streetwise philosophical reverie.
    The DVD has trailers for seven other titles.

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